“All that I wanted were things I had before.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
When it comes to writing a novel, there are those who let the pen do the walking—wherever it takes them, so be it—and those who need to look at a map first. I am of the latter. Mind you, I draw my own map, but I still try and figure out where I’m going before I set out on the path.
Well, the map has been drawn. I laid out the plot points for Lost Gods – Book Two and I’m really excited. I even have a working title—Mark of the Raven. You didn’t think I was going to call it Lost Gods 2, did you? Or Lost Gods – The Revenge. Ha! Espionage, intrigue, romance and murder. Well, magic, yeah, there’s magic in there, too. This is fantasy we’re talking about. But, as in the first book, magic is just a plot device—a catalyst to keep the story moving. The drama is where it really happens. The emotions of the characters.
So… I imagine you’re wondering what Mark of the Raven… or MotR… is about. Hmm… how much do I reveal… I will tell you this—there’s a war coming. And it will still be on the horizon at the end of MotR. On one side, the members of the Circle of Light prepare themselves for battle. I’ll give you three guesses who’s on the opposite side and the first two don’t count.
I’ve never understood that saying. The answer’s always obvious—something you’d guess on the first try. But if the first and second guesses don’t count… I don’t know. Maybe it’s saying, ‘I’ll give you three but you’re only going to need one.’ In fact, that’s what I’m going to say from now on instead of telling you that two-thirds of your guesses don’t count. It would make more sense if it were, ‘I’ll give you three guesses but the last two don’t count,’ because you’d guess it on the first try and don’t need the last two. Either way, I’ll give you three guesses who is on the opposite front from the Circle of Light, but you’ll only need one.
That wild and crazy tangent out of the way…
There’s one minor character from Book One that gets a lot more page time in MotR. Actually, by the end, she will be a major character. Oops. I gave you a hint there, didn’t I… Oh well. You have plenty of minor female characters to ponder over. I think that’s all the information I’m going to give you right now. No need for a
*********SPOILER ALERT**********
yet. When I get an offer for representation, I’ll post the first chapter. How’s that?
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Text Messages from God
“All that I wanted were things I had before.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
I sent out the first query nearly three weeks ago. Now, I’ve sent out a total of thirty-two. Thirteen have come back rejected so far. I’m doing pretty good about staying positive. I know God has an agent out there for me. I just have to find him or her. I do hope that, whoever they are, they accept email queries, because that’s the list I’m going through first—agents who accept e-queries.
God keeps reassuring me, though. He keeps sending me messages that let me know everything will work out. A couple have even been text messages. No. I’m not losing my mind. Twice last week I was driving down the road, thinking about the book and I got behind two different vehicles with a license plate number that began with RVN. To someone else, that might be nothing, but about a month ago, while I was doing my 40 Days of Gradr thing, I was having trouble keeping my mind off the book and I passed a truck stop, at which sat a trailer with Raven Trucking on the side. Tuesday of last week, on the tower, I prayed to have a good day of writing and I heard a crow making a very raven-like sound at a point in my prayer where I had asked God for an answer to a specific question.
All these things, plus my Post 3 Raven story… You can call it coincidence. You can think I’m crazy all you want but I believe God is sending me messages through the raven. And I mean ‘the raven’ as not just a physical bird, but the word, the sound they make, the idea… of the raven. Saturday, my wife had gone shopping. When I got home, she told me she got me something. Her and her mom had seen a t-shirt with ravens on it. God blessed me with an awesome wife.
I’ve thought many times, well, maybe I should be looking for an agent who represents Christian fiction. Lost Gods is not really in that category but I was thinking that the story of how the book came to be and where I am now… eh… it might fit in there on the outskirts of the genre. Now that I think about it, though, I think God has a larger purpose in mind for it than just entertainment for Christians. Exactly what that purpose is, I don’t know yet but the hairs on the back of my neck stand straight up when I think about the possibilities.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
I sent out the first query nearly three weeks ago. Now, I’ve sent out a total of thirty-two. Thirteen have come back rejected so far. I’m doing pretty good about staying positive. I know God has an agent out there for me. I just have to find him or her. I do hope that, whoever they are, they accept email queries, because that’s the list I’m going through first—agents who accept e-queries.
God keeps reassuring me, though. He keeps sending me messages that let me know everything will work out. A couple have even been text messages. No. I’m not losing my mind. Twice last week I was driving down the road, thinking about the book and I got behind two different vehicles with a license plate number that began with RVN. To someone else, that might be nothing, but about a month ago, while I was doing my 40 Days of Gradr thing, I was having trouble keeping my mind off the book and I passed a truck stop, at which sat a trailer with Raven Trucking on the side. Tuesday of last week, on the tower, I prayed to have a good day of writing and I heard a crow making a very raven-like sound at a point in my prayer where I had asked God for an answer to a specific question.
All these things, plus my Post 3 Raven story… You can call it coincidence. You can think I’m crazy all you want but I believe God is sending me messages through the raven. And I mean ‘the raven’ as not just a physical bird, but the word, the sound they make, the idea… of the raven. Saturday, my wife had gone shopping. When I got home, she told me she got me something. Her and her mom had seen a t-shirt with ravens on it. God blessed me with an awesome wife.
I’ve thought many times, well, maybe I should be looking for an agent who represents Christian fiction. Lost Gods is not really in that category but I was thinking that the story of how the book came to be and where I am now… eh… it might fit in there on the outskirts of the genre. Now that I think about it, though, I think God has a larger purpose in mind for it than just entertainment for Christians. Exactly what that purpose is, I don’t know yet but the hairs on the back of my neck stand straight up when I think about the possibilities.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Gradr Journal Entry #9
“All that I wanted were things I had before.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
March 16th, 2010
The last day. The 40th day of my 40 Days of Gradr. I believe I’m stronger now than I was a month and ten days ago. My will is stronger. My mind is more focused. I’m ready. I’m ready to do what needs to be done. I had one final test last night. I had to go online to pay a bill. I did not waver. I’m surprised I didn’t get a tower today. One last chance for my family of crows to haunt me for six hours.
Tomorrow is the beginning of the next phase. I am a butterfly about to emerge from the cocoon. That sounds dramatic and cheesy, I know, but it’s metaphorically accurate. You could say I’ve been in a cocoon for years and started to come out of it last July. I think everyone goes through a metamorphosis or two at some point in their lives. I’ve been through several, myself. Mind you, they’ve been of varying degrees, but the one I’m currently about to step out on the other end of is, in my opinion, the most profound. Especially if you put the beginning at early last year. I will most likely continue this entry later today, but for now… I need more coffee.
Not many people have a nemesis. I do. He is Khan to my Kirk. Longshanks to my William Wallace. Magneto to my Professor X. He’s actually the Raiders fan I spoke of yesterday, so, he’s, literally, the Raiders to my Broncos. I just found out since my last cup of coffee that he is, apparently, emerging from his own cocoon. At the end of a ten year journey. Now that I think about it, I’m also at the end of a ten year journey. It was interesting to think about when I was looking at the context of the last five years, but to take into account the past ten… and for someone else, someone leading a charge on the opposite front, to be completing their own concurring journey, it’s like a real-life comic book story arc. On the one hand, it’s good because we’re both becoming more knowledgeable in our quest to better each other. More knowledgeable of the world. More knowledgeable of ourselves. On the other hand, it’s actually quite sad because the more we debate, the higher and more intense our fiery passion for our cause becomes and the less likely it is that either of us will abandon it.
A fitting end to my Gradr journal entries. This time around at least. We’ll see if next years can top these.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
March 16th, 2010
The last day. The 40th day of my 40 Days of Gradr. I believe I’m stronger now than I was a month and ten days ago. My will is stronger. My mind is more focused. I’m ready. I’m ready to do what needs to be done. I had one final test last night. I had to go online to pay a bill. I did not waver. I’m surprised I didn’t get a tower today. One last chance for my family of crows to haunt me for six hours.
Tomorrow is the beginning of the next phase. I am a butterfly about to emerge from the cocoon. That sounds dramatic and cheesy, I know, but it’s metaphorically accurate. You could say I’ve been in a cocoon for years and started to come out of it last July. I think everyone goes through a metamorphosis or two at some point in their lives. I’ve been through several, myself. Mind you, they’ve been of varying degrees, but the one I’m currently about to step out on the other end of is, in my opinion, the most profound. Especially if you put the beginning at early last year. I will most likely continue this entry later today, but for now… I need more coffee.
Not many people have a nemesis. I do. He is Khan to my Kirk. Longshanks to my William Wallace. Magneto to my Professor X. He’s actually the Raiders fan I spoke of yesterday, so, he’s, literally, the Raiders to my Broncos. I just found out since my last cup of coffee that he is, apparently, emerging from his own cocoon. At the end of a ten year journey. Now that I think about it, I’m also at the end of a ten year journey. It was interesting to think about when I was looking at the context of the last five years, but to take into account the past ten… and for someone else, someone leading a charge on the opposite front, to be completing their own concurring journey, it’s like a real-life comic book story arc. On the one hand, it’s good because we’re both becoming more knowledgeable in our quest to better each other. More knowledgeable of the world. More knowledgeable of ourselves. On the other hand, it’s actually quite sad because the more we debate, the higher and more intense our fiery passion for our cause becomes and the less likely it is that either of us will abandon it.
A fitting end to my Gradr journal entries. This time around at least. We’ll see if next years can top these.
Gradr Journal Entry #8
“All that I wanted were things I had before.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
The Ides of March, 2010
Well, it’s day 39 and I’m not half crazy yet. I’m not counting down the minutes either. That’s a good thing. Right? I have to say, though, it hasn’t been an easy forty days. And not just because of what I’m doing without. We’ve had an elderly family member pass away, my wife tore cartilage in her knee, she’s been having problems with her back and sinuses, my youngest son had tubes put in his ears and now he has a viral throat infection that caused a rash all over his body. I had refresher training for five days, before which, I had to work the whole weekend and the Sunday after, I sneezed and realized very quickly I had a torn pectoral muscle. If that weren’t enough, there’s my brother and his drama, which, by itself, would make an excellent show on TLC. Real Idiots of Davie County. I love my brother, but he is an idiot.
Okay. Now that I got that off my chest… so, the Broncos got Brady Quinn from Cleveland. I’m not sure how I feel about that yet. I can’t say I haven’t wondered how he would have done had Denver picked him instead of Cutler. I mean, look what happened with Cutler. I’m hoping Quinn just hasn’t had the opportunity to shine due to the team he was on. This Raiders fan co-worker of mine pointed out that Ladainian Tomlinson is out of the division. Okay, except there’s a reason for that—because the Chargers don’t need him with Sproles. Anyway, it should be an interesting season, depending on what they do with Brandon Marshall.
I bet you didn’t know this was a sports blog. I’m kidding. Hey, I’ve got to write about something and this is what I’m thinking about today. Deal with it.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
The Ides of March, 2010
Well, it’s day 39 and I’m not half crazy yet. I’m not counting down the minutes either. That’s a good thing. Right? I have to say, though, it hasn’t been an easy forty days. And not just because of what I’m doing without. We’ve had an elderly family member pass away, my wife tore cartilage in her knee, she’s been having problems with her back and sinuses, my youngest son had tubes put in his ears and now he has a viral throat infection that caused a rash all over his body. I had refresher training for five days, before which, I had to work the whole weekend and the Sunday after, I sneezed and realized very quickly I had a torn pectoral muscle. If that weren’t enough, there’s my brother and his drama, which, by itself, would make an excellent show on TLC. Real Idiots of Davie County. I love my brother, but he is an idiot.
Okay. Now that I got that off my chest… so, the Broncos got Brady Quinn from Cleveland. I’m not sure how I feel about that yet. I can’t say I haven’t wondered how he would have done had Denver picked him instead of Cutler. I mean, look what happened with Cutler. I’m hoping Quinn just hasn’t had the opportunity to shine due to the team he was on. This Raiders fan co-worker of mine pointed out that Ladainian Tomlinson is out of the division. Okay, except there’s a reason for that—because the Chargers don’t need him with Sproles. Anyway, it should be an interesting season, depending on what they do with Brandon Marshall.
I bet you didn’t know this was a sports blog. I’m kidding. Hey, I’ve got to write about something and this is what I’m thinking about today. Deal with it.
Gradr Journal Entry #7
“All that I wanted were things I had before.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
March 10th, 2010
I had no idea how difficult this would be. I knew it would be hard, but I didn’t anticipate God sending so many people to test my will. My family has been great at keeping me busy. There are a couple people who didn’t get the memo, but that’s okay. I love them anyway. There is one friend who I expected to be there for me—someone to talk to if I couldn’t talk to my wife. His phone service is cancelled or suspended or something. When I send a text message, the sent message has an arrow if it was successful and then the arrow becomes a checkmark when the recipient gets it. My text to my friend still has an arrow. Now, if I get on facebook, I very well may find a message saying he got a new phone number. Seven days from now I’ll be able to do that, but that doesn’t help me right now.
I miss the camaraderie I had on the Deyo. Black, Wiggins, Sharer, Phelps, Hagg… I miss hanging out with those guys. Faustini was a butthole and Frisoni was annoying sometimes but I miss them all the same. Wiggins is still in the Navy in Florida. I never thought he’d be a lifer. Ronnie Black. That’s my MIA friend. He’s down in the Greenville, SC area. At least he was the last time I talked to him. That was on facebook on February 4th—the day before my 40 days of Gradr started. Maybe this is a test of my will, too. 40 days and I can’t have on of my best friends around for support. Man, is he going to hear about it next week.
I haven’t had that kind of camaraderie since I left the Navy. I guess when you live together, work together, go out together and drink together, you form a bond that lasts forever. Kind of like marriage. Not exactly. I didn’t sleep with anyone in the Navy, though, my nearest neighbors were three feet above me, three below me and four feet to me left.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
March 10th, 2010
I had no idea how difficult this would be. I knew it would be hard, but I didn’t anticipate God sending so many people to test my will. My family has been great at keeping me busy. There are a couple people who didn’t get the memo, but that’s okay. I love them anyway. There is one friend who I expected to be there for me—someone to talk to if I couldn’t talk to my wife. His phone service is cancelled or suspended or something. When I send a text message, the sent message has an arrow if it was successful and then the arrow becomes a checkmark when the recipient gets it. My text to my friend still has an arrow. Now, if I get on facebook, I very well may find a message saying he got a new phone number. Seven days from now I’ll be able to do that, but that doesn’t help me right now.
I miss the camaraderie I had on the Deyo. Black, Wiggins, Sharer, Phelps, Hagg… I miss hanging out with those guys. Faustini was a butthole and Frisoni was annoying sometimes but I miss them all the same. Wiggins is still in the Navy in Florida. I never thought he’d be a lifer. Ronnie Black. That’s my MIA friend. He’s down in the Greenville, SC area. At least he was the last time I talked to him. That was on facebook on February 4th—the day before my 40 days of Gradr started. Maybe this is a test of my will, too. 40 days and I can’t have on of my best friends around for support. Man, is he going to hear about it next week.
I haven’t had that kind of camaraderie since I left the Navy. I guess when you live together, work together, go out together and drink together, you form a bond that lasts forever. Kind of like marriage. Not exactly. I didn’t sleep with anyone in the Navy, though, my nearest neighbors were three feet above me, three below me and four feet to me left.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Gradr Journal Entry #6
“All that I wanted were things I had before.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
February 21st, 2010
I’m getting really tired of this place. It’s not the work that’s getting to me. It’s the people. And mostly the people above me. Supervising inmates and maintaining security at a medium custody prison is, surprisingly, not a difficult thing to do. Having upper management, namely lieutenants and captains, who care for the welfare of the inmates more than they do their officers—that’s what makes the job difficult. I have training all week starting tomorrow. That’s more than forty hours. And they can’t let me off early today. So, I have to work over thirty-six hours in three days and then do five straight nine hour days in addition. There’s supposed to be a case manager job opening up soon. I’m going to apply for it. If I manage to get that position, it won’t change my surroundings very much, but at least I’ll have better hours and weekends off. And if I don’t get it, I’ll put in for every case manager job and probation/parole opening until someone let’s me take off this stupid blue uniform. It’s not the uniform’s fault. It can’t help the fact that it represents a powerless position. Yes, I said powerless. It may say Law Enforcement at the top of our timesheets and prisons across the state may participate in the Law Enforcement Torch Run for Special Olympics, but ask me how many restaurants in Salisbury will give correctional officers the same Law Enforcement discount they give police. Even though the same guys that run the streets and are brought in with the use of guns and tasers are guarded in prison with nothing but pepper spray. Sure, we have guns on the towers, but nobody is stupid enough to try and escape. They’re treated too good here.
Something in my life needs to change. I thought coming to day shift would be the change I needed but the daylight has only opened my eyes and now I’m awake to all the political crap that goes on in here. Who knows? Maybe as a case manager or probation/parole officer I would be even more aware. Ranting and raving did help my headache a little. That’s good. I still feel the same inside, though. Perhaps I need to take my own advice I gave someone recently—Let go. Let God.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
February 21st, 2010
I’m getting really tired of this place. It’s not the work that’s getting to me. It’s the people. And mostly the people above me. Supervising inmates and maintaining security at a medium custody prison is, surprisingly, not a difficult thing to do. Having upper management, namely lieutenants and captains, who care for the welfare of the inmates more than they do their officers—that’s what makes the job difficult. I have training all week starting tomorrow. That’s more than forty hours. And they can’t let me off early today. So, I have to work over thirty-six hours in three days and then do five straight nine hour days in addition. There’s supposed to be a case manager job opening up soon. I’m going to apply for it. If I manage to get that position, it won’t change my surroundings very much, but at least I’ll have better hours and weekends off. And if I don’t get it, I’ll put in for every case manager job and probation/parole opening until someone let’s me take off this stupid blue uniform. It’s not the uniform’s fault. It can’t help the fact that it represents a powerless position. Yes, I said powerless. It may say Law Enforcement at the top of our timesheets and prisons across the state may participate in the Law Enforcement Torch Run for Special Olympics, but ask me how many restaurants in Salisbury will give correctional officers the same Law Enforcement discount they give police. Even though the same guys that run the streets and are brought in with the use of guns and tasers are guarded in prison with nothing but pepper spray. Sure, we have guns on the towers, but nobody is stupid enough to try and escape. They’re treated too good here.
Something in my life needs to change. I thought coming to day shift would be the change I needed but the daylight has only opened my eyes and now I’m awake to all the political crap that goes on in here. Who knows? Maybe as a case manager or probation/parole officer I would be even more aware. Ranting and raving did help my headache a little. That’s good. I still feel the same inside, though. Perhaps I need to take my own advice I gave someone recently—Let go. Let God.
Gradr Journal Entry #5
“All that I wanted were things I had before.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
February 20th, 2010
I’m having trouble coming up with something to write about today. I think the best cure for writer’s block is to write about having writer’s block. Not that this journal thing is something that needs to be done everyday by any means. I’m just bored out here on the tower—again—and can’t think of anything to write about that doesn’t have to do with the book.
The last time I checked before my 40 Days of Grady, I had two followers on my blog. Assuming I’ll accumulate more as time goes by, someone is going to wonder what I mean by ‘Circular Path.’ There are a few meanings hidden in there. A circle is a single, unbroken line—never-ending. You take one section out and it’s no longer a circle—everything it had encompassed falls apart. My life is a circle. I grew up in a broken home. My sons are growing up in a broken home. I was on a Christian path in high school. Then, I strayed for several years. Now, I’m back on my Christian journey. If you remove any single element of my life, all that I am ceases to exist. Another definition of my ‘circular path’ comes from the song “Circle” by Slipknot, which I quote at the top of my blog. Some might think it strange that I, being a spiritual, Christian person would quote Slipknot, but give the song a listen if you have the opportunity. It’s one of their softer, slower songs, so you can actually understand what Corey is saying when he sings.
The third definition is represented in the book and I’m not talking about that right now, so, I’m going to let you find that one on your own.
All that I needed I never needed more.
All of my questions are answers to my sins.
All of my endings are waiting to begin.”
From Circle by Slipknot
February 20th, 2010
I’m having trouble coming up with something to write about today. I think the best cure for writer’s block is to write about having writer’s block. Not that this journal thing is something that needs to be done everyday by any means. I’m just bored out here on the tower—again—and can’t think of anything to write about that doesn’t have to do with the book.
The last time I checked before my 40 Days of Grady, I had two followers on my blog. Assuming I’ll accumulate more as time goes by, someone is going to wonder what I mean by ‘Circular Path.’ There are a few meanings hidden in there. A circle is a single, unbroken line—never-ending. You take one section out and it’s no longer a circle—everything it had encompassed falls apart. My life is a circle. I grew up in a broken home. My sons are growing up in a broken home. I was on a Christian path in high school. Then, I strayed for several years. Now, I’m back on my Christian journey. If you remove any single element of my life, all that I am ceases to exist. Another definition of my ‘circular path’ comes from the song “Circle” by Slipknot, which I quote at the top of my blog. Some might think it strange that I, being a spiritual, Christian person would quote Slipknot, but give the song a listen if you have the opportunity. It’s one of their softer, slower songs, so you can actually understand what Corey is saying when he sings.
The third definition is represented in the book and I’m not talking about that right now, so, I’m going to let you find that one on your own.
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